My ex fiance...

Who I split up with in October 2003 asked me a question last week. "Why did I finish with him?" The reason I think he asked this is because his current girlfriend, who I wish I could say I hated but actually like a great deal has decided that she and her family are going on a diet. She has done well and lost 13lbs in just under 2 weeks (well done Becca if you are reading this!)

Anyway, my ex, Darren deserved the truth. The problem is, I always said it was because I did not love him anymore which is true but it was time to be honest to both myself and him and admit that the truth is I never really loved him in the first place. I'm right in saying you know you've fallen in love with someone when you get butterflies in your stomach when you see them right? Well I've had them once or twice but never with Darren. To be honest, when we met (02 June 2000) I was around 23.5 - 24 stone and I was just happy that someone wanted to be with me.

That is not to say that Darren and I did not have some great times because we did. However, we did not really have anything in common. I loved football, he hated it. He loved going out, I'm happy to stay in (although that is not to say I don't like going out now and again). I like pop/soft rock music, he likes hard rock and heavy metal. He likes horror films, I hate them. I could go on and on but I am sure you get the picture.

In October 2002 I joined WW'ers. I encouraged Darren to join too or at the very least join in with me. All he said was "I can't!" I lost around 5 stone that time but looking back now I can see that I was never going to succeed as I didn't "tackle my saboteurs" head on. We'd go shopping and Darren would want McDonalds etc and I would be expected to sit and watch him eat it. He'd moan we had not been out for a Chinese or curry in ages. I'd cuddle up to him and he'd say there was not much to cuddle upto anymore. If only that were true. I can look back now and say I'm not sure he ever wanted me to lose weight and be healthy and I think I know why. I think it was because he was scared I would leave him, which I did when I got some confidence but that was not to do with the weight, or at least I didn't think so at the time.

As for Darren, he's decided he too is going to diet and I've offered to help him. It won't be easy but if I can help him on his way, I'll feel better for it and also know I am helping a good friend to rescue their life.

Vicky xxx

My goals

It was so quiet the other day that I sat and wrote this on paper and now here I am typing it up. I was working out milestones. I thought I would share them with you.

My milestones are:

18 7 - 7 stone lost (3lb to go)
18 5 - 100lb lost (5lb to go)
17 11 - 30% of body weight lost.
17 7 - 8 stone lost
17 4 - Holiday target (8 WI's to get this) / half way
16 8 - Weight started in August 1991
16 7 - 9 stone lost
15 7 - 10 stone lost
15 3 - 40% of body weight lost
14 11 - 150lbs lost
14 7 - 11 stone lost
14 3 - Weigh under 200lbs
13 7 - 12 stone lost
12 9 - 50% of body weight lost
12 7 - 13 stone lost
11 7 - 14 stone lost
11 3 200lbs lost
10 7 15 stone lost
10 1 Healthy BMI
9 7 16 stone lost
9 stone - GOAL!!!! (may up this by a few pounds when I get there.)

So there we have them. I am going to try very hard to maintain during my holiday. My last WI before this will be on 21st June and the next one will be 5th July 2007 so I will have a few days either side to make up for the Devon cream teas and ice-cream that I know will be very hard to avoid. However, I'll have free use of a gym and swimming pool whilst there and we plan to do lots of walking so hopefully all will not be lost (or should that be gained?).

I'll set little targets after my holiday but my next major target has to be aimed at my year anniversary of weight watchers on October 18th. If I could reach 15 stone 7lbs by then - which would be 10 stone lost - I'll be over the moon. My then target will be to be at 14 stone 3lbs (weighing under 200lbs) by Christmas. That way I will know that 2008 will be the year that I real goal.

Of course, these targets may change but I think they are realistic and won't leave me disappointed if I don't reach them.

Vicky xxx

P.S. I've added another "before" picture today. It was taken on my 30th birthday last year and the person with me is George, a former work colleague. It's another picture I hate.

Two games left

There are just two games left for my team to reach the play offs this season. Currently we are 1 point short and of course if the teams above us win, then it does not matter how we do. However, our game at Norwich tomorrow really is a "must win game!" Norwich do not have anything to play for so some will see this as an easy 3 points. However, this is Saints we are talking about and I learnt a long time ago not to take anything for granted when it involves them. All I know is that it is now or never and if I was writing this two hours ago I would say we needed promotion to guarantee our financial future.

However, since I got home from work and swimming it has become apparent that the board are considering an offer from none other than Paul Allen. Paul Allen was the co founder of Microsoft and is worth an estimated £9b , making him the world's 19th richest man. If this is true I won't need to lose anymore weight as I'll be floating already!!!!

For now though, let's concentrate on the football and leave the rest til the end of the season.

COYRs!!!! (come on you reds)

Vicky xx

Alan Ball RIP

I was deeply saddened to hear of the passing on of the great Alan Ball.

Alan played for Southampton Football Club but I can't say I really remember him as a player. My two main memories of the great man are him getting the best 18 months out of Matt Le Tissier and having the privilege to meet the man himself at a Guide Dog evening at a pub my mum used to be assistant manager at (The Silver Fern in Warsash).

He was a wonderful man and touched the lives of many people, especially in the footballing words of Southampton, Portsmouth and Everton. As someone said recently "It takes a very special person to be a hero at both Southampton and Portsmouth!"

Alan was the youngest player to play in the 1966 cup final and was the players man of the match. He joins Bobby Moore in the world cup heaven and I'm sure Bobby has a beer or two waiting for him.

Alan you will be greatly missed.

Vicky xxx (picture with thanks to BBC)

WI Result (26th April 2007)

The scales were very kind to me this week and showed a 4lb loss. This means I have lost 95lbs in total and am now 5lbs away from joining the longed for 100lb club. I have also reached and past a very small mini goal of 18 stone 13lbs (I'm 18 stone 10lbs) which was the weight I started WW'ers at in 1996. The reason this is a milestone is that I know it starts to really show from here on in and I am now at a weight I feel I can do this from.

Another point of mention is that from next week I will be a helper at my meeting. I spoke to Marie, my leader a couple of weeks ago and mentioned that one day I too would like to become a leader as I feel this would keep me at goal even if I just do one or two meetings a week. I think this is a good way to get a foot in the door and hopefully by the time I reach goal, I'll be well on the way.

Vicky xxxx

Liberty of the Seas

A lot of you will think I am mad getting up and walking 4 miles to the docks to watch a ship come in this morning. However, this was not just any old ship. It was the Liberty of the Seas, the worlds biggest cruise (or any other) ship. I left home at 0615 and had about an hour and a half wait for her to come in but I am sure from these pictures you will agree, it was well worth the wait.

My WI result (19th April)

So, tonight at the scales I recorded a 2lb loss. That takes me to 91lb overall which is exactly 6 and a half stone. I am very happy with that and now I'm concentrating on reaching my 100lb certificate in a few weeks time.

I'm hoping to become a helper at my meeting from next week or the week after. It is not certain yet as my boss is on holiday and I have to check it is ok to leave at 1630 but if I can, it will be great. I won't lie. One day I do hope to become a leader and I think this would be a small step towards that.

Thanks to all of you for your lovely comments over the past few weeks. Someone suggested I should write a Bridget Jones style diary about my weightloss journey and if my life was a little bit more exciting, maybe I'd think about doing that but most of the time I just get up go to work and either come home or go to the gym/swimming. Not really very exciting is it? LOL

Anyway enjoy your weekends.

Vicky xxxxx

My WI result (12th April 2007)

I'm shocked that after having my family around on Sunday and drinking a bottle of Malibu between 2 of us and then giving in to the trifle, even though it was 8.8g of sat fat I lost 4lbs!!!! I know I did lots of exercise etc but even so, I did not deserve that 4lb loss so this week coming I'm being extra extra good just incase it catches up with me.

In total now I've lost 89lbs. That is by far the most I've ever lost in one go with WW'ers. I now weigh 19 stone 2lbs and another 2lbs will take me to 6 and a half stone lost, 2.5lbs to the 18s and 3lbs to the weight I was when I started WW'ers in January 1996. It also means I only have to lose 26lbs to complete my mini goal of being mums weight now by my holiday which is 25th June. I'm hoping the Mid Summers Day challenge will help me complete that.

I'm having my hair done tomorrow so I'll get a couple of pictures. I also have to share this with you. When I joined the gym this time last month I brought a pair of bottoms in a size 28 which fitted me perfectly. I also brought a pair in a size 26. As my 28s were getting a bit big I tried on the 26s today and they now fit me perfectly. Is that a good thing or what? problem is, I'll have no clothes to wear before long.

Anyway, I'm waffling so I'm going. Tonight the picture is of my cousins 10th old baby Amber. She is totally gorgeous and the most well behaved baby I've ever know.

Vicky xxx

When we were young

Would you look at the skinny minny in the pictures!!! Ok explained in easy terms. The first one (in Rangers shirt) was taken when I worked in Greece when I was 16. I worked on a small island called Aegina and the reason for the Rangers shirt is my dads best mate came to visit and is a big Rangers fan. I lost a bet and wore the shirt. It was taken in August 1992 and I weighed around about 10 stone 8lbs, almost the lowest I have ever been. The main with me is Theo, my boss who I love dearly and miss like crazy.

The one of me in the Hard Rock Cafe t-shirt was taken with Dad in May 1993. We were just about to go to Glasgow to visit his friend which leads me onto picture 3 taken at Hampden Park also in May 2003. I was about 13 stone something in those pictures. Hampden Park was undergoing a major refurb at the time and it was funny going back there last year and seeing how much it has changed in 13 years.

The final picture was taken in July 1996 at Wembley Stadium. I used to work there and treated my dad and his flatmate Toby (in the picture) to a tour of the stadium. I was about 12 stone 7 ish there.

I found these out to remind myself what I looked like at those weights and it really has spurred me on because I know I can look that good again and it is not that far away.

Let me know what you think of the pictures.

Vicky xxx

What a difference a year makes!!!

Well I think you can tell which one was taken on Easter Sunday last year. Whoa what a difference. I'm so proud of the pictures taken today. I look good and feel good. I still have 9 stone 13lbs to go to goal but I'm not thinking of that. Nor am I thinking of what I ate and drunk today because at the end of the day, one bad day (which was a very good day) does not mean I fall off the wagon anymore. I admit, a long time ago it would have meant exactly that but this is a new and improved Vicky you are talking too and that is not going to happen. I'm back on it now and have had a great day today. It was nice to spend quality time with my family.

Last day off work tomorrow and I'm going to watch Saints V Sunderland. We've had back to back away wins but tomorrow is a big game that we really need to win. I also plan to the gym and relax a bit because from Tuesday I will have to work all my hours (60 a week) until my holiday on 25th June. I also plan to stick to WW's plan and my exercise plan until my holiday as I want to lose some serious weight before holiday. 12 weeks to go from tomorrow so who knows that will happen in that time.

Sometime soon, I'll be updating my blog with pictures I have scanned in. They were taken from the ages 16-20 and you'll see why I like them when I post them.

Hope you are all having a great Easter.

Vicky xxxx

My latest picture!!!

This one was taken today (in Turquoise top). I've lost 6 stone, 1 lb and I've included another horrible before picture. I hope you can see the difference.

Well today I've not done very much except have a two hour gossip with mum and go swimming. I find swimming quite boring really but I will keep going twice a week as I know it is good for you. I do 32 lengths every time I go and am comfortable with this so in a month or so I might up this to 40. In the pool I use, that'll be 1km.

For the rest of the day I have housework and tonight I'll watch a DVD and relax. I hope you are all having a good Easter.

WI Result (5th April 2007)

My 25th week of Weightwatchers (I know this because my card is now full and the only week I missed was Christmas week) and another loss this week. I lost 1lb. I am happy with that as I have noticed a pattern to my weightloss of two or three good weeks and then a quiet one. However, 1lb is brilliant and most people would be very happy with that, I'm just greedy lol. I've now lost 85lbs in total and now need just 30lbs to complete my challenge of being Mum's weight now for my holiday at the end of June.

Hope you all have a great Easter weekend.

Vicky xxx

p.s This photo was taken in 2003 outside Robbie Williams parents old pub, the Red Lion in Burslem, Stoke on Trent. Yes we were sad enough to visit it and I've even been in his bedroom lol.

The gym this evening

I finished work at 5 this evening so I paid an extra visit to the gym. I still banned myself from the treadmill and made myself do 25 minutes on the cross trainer. I actually enjoyed it but I will admit it is hard work. Still, no pain no gain right? I also did 7km on the bike so I did 10km in total which I am very happy with.

Not much else to chat about today. I can't remember if I told you but I'm updating the address database at work. It should be a two day job but I'm going to make it last 4 if it kills me. I don't think I can eek it out that long though so I may just have to look busy tomorrow.

Anyway, better go and get some sleep. Going to the gym is tiring work. I thought you might like a picture of a man in costume today lol.

Goodnight

Vicky xxx

Aqua cancelled tonight

Second time in 5 days one has been cancelled now but I cannot say I am that upset because I am tired and it means I get to bed an hour or so earlier than I would normally.

I've decided to stop weighing myself on my scales at home for the time being as I do not think they are that accurate. They make me over 4lbs heavier than I am at WW'ers and that varies depending on the week so I'm going to skip them from now on. It doesn't bother me weighing mid week but in future, I'll save this for the gym or the leisure centre scales.

Ricky, our fitter at work got rushed to hospital last night with a suspected heart attack. He is a stressy one is our Rick and obese, not to mention the fact he smokes heavily too. It does bring it home and remind me why I am doing this. Of course, I am worried about Ricky and I hope his wife brings good news soon.

Please forgive me for the depressing end to this email. It's past my bedtime now.

Vicky xxx

P.s. The picture is again one of Steves'. I'll get some of my own soon I promise.

Entry to Mid Summers Day Challenge

Please note that entry to this challenge is now closed and no further entries will be accepted.

Vicky xxx

March Madness

So the third month of 2007 is already over. I hope it has been good for you. It is hard to believe we are in April already. Did anyone get any April fools jokes played on them? I forgot all about it to be honest until after midday but that was probably not a bad thing as I normally fall for them lol.

As a recap then, I set myself three goals to achieve in 2007.

1. To give up smoking
2. To get fit
3. To carry on losing weight.

Well so far so good. I gave up smoking on the 3rd January and now I do not even think about smoking anymore. This year, I've lost 42.5lbs and - most impressively - I've joined a gym and am loving it. I've never done so much exercise in my lifetime as I have the past few weeks. I also now go to two aqua classes as well as going swimming twice a week and I really do think my shape and size is benefitting from it all.

My little task for this month is to ban myself from the treadmill and do cross trainer work. I find the cross trainer hard but I can manage 15 minutes now. I want to really work on it this month and hopefully build up to 25 or even 30 minutes by the end of the month.

It is now 12 weeks until my holiday and in my quest to "catch up with mum", I now have 31lbs to go. It means I have to lose 2.58lbs a week until my holiday. This is a tough target but one I am going to work very hard to achieve.

Anyway I'm off to bed. Today's picture was taken by Steve again and is of the Civic Centre Clock. I live 4 or so miles from it , probably less as the crow flies and on a clear quiet night, you can hear it chime from here.

Vicky xxx