This person that I did not like and now I've realised why. It is because I was fat, lonely and had no life! Don't get me wrong, I had friends but my life was boring and I did not have any self respect.
It has taken me a lot to think I could write this entry but I've come to see that I can only move on with my life if I embrace my demons and apologise to those that I've hurt along the way. Of course, that is not something I can do on a blog entry but it is something I will get around to doing in time.
Society as a whole frowns upon those of us that are unfortunate to be obese and not a perfect size 10 and I used to think that was the main reason that I never had friends, because I was "fat" and who wants to be friends with a fat girl? However, I was wrong and kidding myself. I would not have wanted to be friends with me as I was then. I was rude, selfish, boring and like I said, did not even like me.
Since I have lost weight I have realised that a lot of my problems come from two very personal things that happened to me in my late teens and early 20s. I won't go into them but they are both related to men and both led me to gaining a lot of weight. It took me a long long time to move over them but I am over them and it is time to move on.
I've also come to realise that I do not like my job anymore which leads me to probably not performing the best I can at it. I have decided that I will really make an effort at work now but also I shall begin searching for another job, but I shall not leave my current one until I find the right one for me.
I have a life now and it is one I do not intend to ruin, sit back and let pass me by again. Life is for living and that is exactly what I am going to do. THE TIME IS NOW!!!
Vicky xx
4 comments:
Vicky, what an honest and inspiring post. It's so hard to be objective about yourself.
I think when we're fat we get the attitude in before someone can be horrible to us so we can then say that they don't like us because of what we said not what we look like.
I just also wanted to say, I love reading your blog, you're a complete inspiration to me
Hugs,
Alli (Minterne on 5+ boards)
That must have been as you sad so hard to write. good luck with the rest of your journey to finding a real & true YOU x
Vicki i have this weekend created my own blog, and i have to tell you, that i have you in my fist ever blog, about you being such an insperation.
I hope you dont mind!
You can check it out @ http://mazsweightwatchersjourney.blogspot.com/
xxxxxx
This is great info to know.
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